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Who's right to choose?

Alice

Alice

Big Landy Fan
A family in Essex want their disabled daughter to undergo a hysterectomy to save them the possible discomfort of periods.
Wisely in my oppinion the charity Scope will support the family where possible but will not back their decision as they feel it is a matter for the Court of human rights to decide.

In another news story this evening a man suffering from MS was not told that his condition had been diagnosed for the past eight years.

Who would you choose to act on your behalf?
 
Alice said:
A family in Essex want their disabled daughter to undergo a hysterectomy to save them the possible discomfort of periods.
Wisely in my oppinion the charity Scope will support the family where possible but will not back their decision as they feel it is a matter for the Court of human rights to decide.

In another news story this evening a man suffering from MS was not told that his condition had been diagnosed for the past eight years.

Who would you choose to act on your behalf?
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You don't give any details of the disability, so could be anything from can't use left leg - through to being totally physcially and mentally incapable. Now I'm not really sure - but if you assume that their daughter at the more incapable end of the above, I can sort of understand why the parents might feel this is the right thing to do. For example if the daughter cannot understand anything - trying to explain that periods are natural and not too worry could be impossible and cause worry/suffering to the daughter. It would also remove any potentail of some perve*t getting her pregnant in later life, there are some evil people in the world.

However on the other hand; there could be a medical break through tomorrow which would mean in 3 years time she is a total normal (whatever that means) girl - of which the parent have now removed any chance of being able to have childern.

Please note that I'm not sure whether or not I agree with the parents wishes, but I could see a situation in which they could come to this conclusion.

In terms of who I would rather make that call, say Scope; Parents or Human rights courts - not sure.

The parents are prob the ones that will be looking after their daughter for the rest of her life, so they are the ones that will be most affected by the result. That said the Human rights courts are prob in a better position to make a judgement without the emotions that the parents will have. Given that I would have thought then that Scope should be the ideal between the parents (they understand the best what the parents are going through, the reasons why the parents what to do) and the courts (who prob have no real idea as to what the parents are going through, but have none of the emotion surround the situation) to make that call.

I pray that I never have to make a decision like the above.
 
my eldest son,(David) is autistic with all other kinds of global delays the one thing that is consantly in the back of my mind is that he may never have a partner get maried have kids, he is 13 now still seems to me about 4 ,
i have worked for the scocial work for seven years and in that time i have seen many succesfull relation ships within people who have learning and or physical disabilaties the whole thing is about choice and then supporting them in that choice,
 
The important thing to remember when discussing these emotive subjects is that we should consider the QUALITY of life rather than the QUANTITY of it.

I wouldn't like to be resuscitated only to live the rest of my life as a cabbage.

As kram states, we need to look at choices and the reasons behind why those choices are made
 
mind you i may be a hypocrtye cause it was me who decided he had six of his teeth removed due to over croudin and is now going to where a brace for a year,i decided on his school,i decided on the best medication for his epilepsy,infact there isnt a day that goes buy that i make some kind of decision for him
 

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I think before anyone is entitled to have an opinion on decisions made by the parents of special needs children, they should have sole care of that child for a year.
I don't mean giving impartial advice if the parent wants it, I mean an opinion.
There are a lot of experts, with a lot of qualifications out there. Well up on what is fashionably politically correct.
Luckily for them at 5 o'clock they can walk away from their decisions, opinions and advice, and go back to their lives, leaving the parents to continue with the very real task of caring.
Isn't there an red Indian saying...Something about, walking a mile in another mans shoes.
Cya
mungo
 
hense my real reason for no longer working with people who have learning disabilaties i tried my best but having my own son with autisim seemed to contradict every thing i did,
i just not coap with all the daft pollicys any more.
i was sugesting one thing to a carer then fighting it for my boy
 
kram said:
mind you i may be a hypocrtye cause it was me who decided he had six of his teeth removed due to over croudin and is now going to where a brace for a year,i decided on his school,i decided on the best medication for his epilepsy,infact there isnt a day that goes buy that i make some kind of decision for him
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He's beautiful :)
 
Perhaps a hysterectomy is a difficult op to say yes to (especially as it's mainly men on the forum) There again you often have to live with wimmin & so suffer also. So have as much say as the next person. If the op is nessessary on medical grounds ie:halting cancer or stopping a cyst then the decision is easier to make because it is obviously the better option.
In this case the lack of sex drive resulting is not the drawback that it is for many adults. Although a major operation to put someone through who has little understanding of what is being done to them & the inherent risks it poses is a concern. Many women still suffer depressions from medically enforced menopause and often will still under go pains possibly similar to the discomforts of periods.
Reassuring the parents may well be a better option. Pain threshold varies from person to person & much of the worst kind of pain is that which arises from fear.
 
Is there not medication available to stop periods? I can there point of view but like someone said if a miracle cure turned up tomorrow its a bit late.
Not a situation I would like to have to cope with.
 
steve@offroadin said:
Is there not medication available to stop periods? I can there point of view but like someone said if a miracle cure turned up tomorrow its a bit late.
Not a situation I would like to have to cope with.
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There might be Steve, I don't know. HRT Hormone replacement therapy is to stop the menopause but that's said to increase risk of breast cancer. It's proving true with my Mother :) but she insists on having it to ease rhumatoid arthritus (iffy sp) My sprogs did say the news mentioned some kind of drug to halt growth but this might have been when they mentioned a slightly similar case in America.

I can't see that having periods is something to worry about. It seems to me to be more a case of Maunchausan by proxy. (sp?)
I worked for 9yrs in a residential home for adults with severe disabilities and having a period was only a problem with one who use to become extremely aggresive & hurt staff quite a bit.

One other had a child quite young when she was a prostitute which was terribly sad as she was always asking about her daughter, when would they let her see her, why didn't they let her look after her baby, she loved her very much. She finally met after 18yrs, her daughter had no learning difficulties but as any child placed in care she had a right to know who her Mother was.
 
There is another case in the US where thay have gone to much more extreme measures to keep a 9 year old from growing into puberty

US doctors are helping to keep a severely disabled girl child-sized at her parent's request.
Ashley X was born with severe and permanent brain damage, called static encephalopathy.

The nine-year-old has the mental ability of a three-month-old baby and cannot walk or talk.

Her parents argue that keeping her "frozen" as a girl rather than letting her go through puberty and growing into a woman will give her a better life.

They authorised doctors to remove her uterus to prevent menstruation, to limit her breast growth through the removal of breast buds so that she would not experience discomfort when lying down, and give her doses of hormones to stop her growing taller.

Opponents have accused Ashley's parents of "Frankenstein-esque" behaviour - of maiming the child for the sake of convenience.
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As to it being right or wrong I can't say as I'm not in their situation

There is more on the story here
 
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Thank-you for the link... Mmm, doesn't leave me feeling too good after reading the last paragraph. :(

I find it curious as to whom I consider is more 'sick'.
 
It's the fact that it almost appears to have been overlooked that cutting someone open & taking out a few bits that aren't lightly to be useful isn't deemed as wrong, let alone intrusive surgery with risks of infection and discomfort of the patient.. best avoided.
Next someone will come up with the idea of taking out 4 fiths of the brain on the grounds that they can't think of a use for it. P'raps fitting an ipod or other novel piece of equipment as an alternative.
 
I think this is more to do with the parents being able to cope. If the girl goes through puberty she will, apparently, get heavier so be harder to care for, amongst many other things. Remember, it is the parents who do the caring. They have a right to make life as tolerable as they can.
 
They certainly ought be consulted. I suppose it is much more complicated when considering how the law may stand with regards to adults right compared to those of a child & an adults rights with a mental age of a child.

The right to obtain corrective or cosmetic surgery & whether or not unnessesary surgery is termed as abuse. If that were the case then a child who seems likely to be abused by his or her parents would ordinarily be saved by intervention from social services thus the parents would be saved from feeling the need to make such life altering decisions.

Would anyone wish their partner to have her breasts removed simply because it might be more comfortable to lay on their front?
 
Alice said:
Would anyone wish their partner to have her breasts removed simply because it might be more comfortable to lay on their front?
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What, and have them grafted onto her back....I would consider it I suppose, as a form of birth control:D
 
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